Before getting into the substance of the dispute, individuals need to understand and decide what the most appropriate process is and what role I might play to assist.  The process options are in the context of a continuum.  At the one end of the continuum is the approach with the least amount of intervention by others and the most control by you and your spouse (partner/ex-spouse).  At the other end is, the most amount of intervention and the least control which is the court process and the ultimately trial.

 

At the end of the continuum with least intervention there are a number of options to consider.  First there is working it out yourself.  That is, sitting down together and trying to work out some solutions that will meet your unique needs.  If you think this might work for you, you can resource yourself in a variety of ways to ensure that you are covering all the bases---first there is the parenting after separation course which is required; second there is federal government website on child support and spousal support and there is also the family law centre at the Courthouse if additional assistance is required. 

 

If you are concerned about talking on your own or feel you need a little more support--then there is mediation.  The mediator provides legal information as well as communication and conflict support.  If you feel you can talk about certain things on your own but seem to hit snags on hot button issues--mediation may vary well work for you.  In order to conclude a written agreement you will ultimately need independent counsel.  However, the mediation process simply assists you in proceeding through matters without hearing it twice from different sources.

 

Further up the intervention continuum is collaborative family law.  This process is essentially lawyer-assisted negotiation.  This process might make sense if you feel you require a lawyer beside you at all times.  It may be that one or the other of you feels you can't do it because you don't have the resources or feel uncomfortable.  There may also be significant trust issues.  Of course with two lawyers at the table it is a more expensive process.

 

Then further along the continuum is an arbitration and court process such as judicial dispute resolution and trial.  These are certainly necessary when parties have problems negotiating in good faith or they are not capable of negotiating for one reason or another. 

 

I would like you to consider your options and whether I might be the right lawyer for you. I am taking on new mediation and collaborative family files only. My policy is not to meet with you until I am clear of the process and the nature of the retainer.  If you are looking for help with the other options, there are other lawyers in our firm who choose to take on more conflicted matters which may require Court attendance.

 

If you are not sure which option makes sense I would be happy to speak with your spouse about these options too. I will not provide advice or legal information and would not do so until the nature of my retainer is clear in any event.  As a result all the options remain on the table and no line has been crossed.